dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
