do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I could fuck to npr.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
