First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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