No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I think a kid would responsible me up
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
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