And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
