remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
So. Much. Porn.
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