You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Randomize
