i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
