We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
