Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize