Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
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