drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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