if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I'm really into asian looking animals
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
