he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize