I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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