I wannas sexs uuuuu
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
