My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
