If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
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