yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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