ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
