Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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