White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Randomize
