3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize