she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
