Just cropdusted the office
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I had to cum in my sink.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
