Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
