I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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