My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
