I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
