what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
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