I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
