he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
