My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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