i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
