Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
time to smoke my breakfast
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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