If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
