What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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