You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
