We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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