I feel like abortions should bother me more
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
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