I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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