I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
