Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
barbara walters just said penis...
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
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