check it out our google latitudes are spooning
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
