today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Randomize
