omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I am one with the molecules
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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