dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
