the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
