ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
