Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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