there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
